Wands at the Ready

by Megathruster

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about

Megathruster's sophomore album! An album about geek life, geek love, and not taking any shit.

"This is the best album I've ever heard!" - Chris' Mom

credits

released October 31, 2017

Megathruster is:
Bass and Vocals – Chris Waffle
Guitar, Synths, and Vocals – Joel Machiela

Vocals on Track 4 – Sarah Donner
Cello on Track 9 – Aubrey Webber
Drums on Tracks 7 and 8 – Andy LaFlamme
Drums on Track 12 – Christian Lipski

Additional Background Vocals – Sarah Spoon-Waffle, Wendy Hutchinson, Jennifer Trundy, Carol Kramer

Produced by Joel Machiela

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all rights reserved

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about

Megathruster Portland, Oregon

Music by two Hufflepuffs in Oregon who love Chewbacca, friendship & keeping it fuckin' real.

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Track Name: The Rockstitution of the United States of Anerdica
(Spoken) We the Geeks, Nerds, and Dorks of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union, establish Justice, promote reading a good book, and secure Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, do ordain and establish this ROCKstitution for the United States of ANERDICA

Article one - we’re gonna have lots of fun
Article two – and here’s some fact based science for you, it’s well past due

Article three - more superheroes on tv
Article four - city hall is now at the game store, and there’s so much more

Comic cons is where all money is spent
We hold these truths to be self-evident

In The Rockstitution of the United States of Anerdica
The Rockstitution of the United States of Anerdica
And it’s time to join the party

Article Five – Cosplay at work is now authorized
Article Six – is Wheaton’s Law, just Don’t be a dick, It’s easy to fix

Article Seven – No more bullies or aggression
Article eight – Han Shot First, we put an end to the debate, we reject the update

“Live long and Prosper” is our battle cry
That’s why we came together to ratify

The Rockstitution of the United States of Anerdica
The Rockstitution of the United States of Anerdica
And it’s time to join the party

In the course of human events sometimes you must rise up and dissent
Four score and seven years ago we got our dice bags and now we’re ready to go

It’s the rockstitution Of these united states Of Anerdica
And it’s time-
To put your Hancock on the line

And it’s time to join the party
Track Name: Interconnected Cinematic Universe
Remember that film you saw about a year ago
Well I just found out something that I thought you should know
Remember in the third act when they mentioned that one guy
Well he’s getting his own movie and it’s coming in July

Stay after the main credits
You can’t miss a thing

It’s an interconnected cinematic universe
An interconnected cinematic universe
It’s not too great but it could be a lot worse
It’s an interconnected cinematic universe

Now that the sequel’s out I have some really good news
The netflix spinoff show has gotten a ton of views
So they’re making another one with the cousin of the first guy
It makes a ton of sense as long as you don’t ask why

Better read the comic tie-in
You can’t miss a thing

(Spoken) As Hollywood continues to cash in on this trend, Megathruster asks you to ignore the corporate greed and please be courteous to others and silence your cell phones now. Your feature presentation will begin after the following chorus.

The plot line will be resolved
In 2053

It’s an interconnected cinematic universe
An interconnected cinematic universe
It’s not too great but it could be a lot worse
It’s an interconnected cinematic universe

It’s an interconnected cinematic universe
An interconnected cinematic universe
It’s not too great but it could be a lot worse
It’s an interconnected cinematic universe
Track Name: Wands at the Ready
You’re looking for a world that’s filled with mystery
But you think we didn’t learn our spells
Well now I’m telling you that’s ancient history
And we got the power if you can’t tell

When we were younger, you’d just call us a couple ‘o nerds
Now come a little closer we’re about to say the magic words

We’ve got our wands at the ready and we’re holding on to ‘em tight
When we whip them out, you know they’re going to make your night
When the magic happens, it’s gonna be quite a sight
We’ve got our wands at the ready

It may look like they were forged in fire
Cuz they look hot to the touch
It’s going to grant your every desire
And you'll be sayin' thank you very much

When we were younger we didn’t know how to use ‘em
Now that we’re older, we promise not to abuse ‘em

We’ve got our wands at the ready and we’re holding on to ‘em tight
They look intimidating but it’s going to be all right
Guaranteed to quench any appetite
We’ve got our wands at the ready

We’ve got Wands (WANDS) at (AT) THE READY
We’ve got Wands (WANDS) at (AT) THE READY
We’ve got Wands (WANDS) at (AT) THE READY
We’ve got Wands (WANDS) at (AT) THE READY

We’ve got our wands at the ready and we’re holding on to ‘em tight
When we whip them out, you know they’re going to make your night
When the magic happens, it’s gonna be quite a sight

We’ve got our wands at the ready
Track Name: With Love, From Starkiller Base
I’m going to tell you a story ‘bout a man and his wife
Separated by light years due to galactic strife
You must fight the resistance they told him one day
And she cried as she watched the transport fly away

They trained him to fight but he could not shoot well
So they made him a guard down in the prison cells
She stayed in his heart, he stayed on her mind
And she waited and waited back on Hosnian Prime

Say you’ll come back to me, XB-813
I’ll come back to you and we’ll see this through
Don’t let them see the tears running down your face
I’ll send you my love from the Starkiller Base

Soon came the day when the base had their test run
They drained all the power from the nearest sun
The target was chosen, the beam true and straight
The lovers left longing, not knowing their fate

She was walking along through the city square
To send a message to him wishing that she was there
What the hell is that? She heard someone cry
She only had one last thought as red filled the sky

Say you’ll come back to me, XB-813
I’ll come back to you and we’ll see this through
Don’t let them see the tears running down your face
I’ll send you my love from the Starkiller Base

The news traveled fast, his homeworld was gone
And he wondered how he could ever live on
He was rendered defenseless from the pain in his heart
He wished for her touch as the base ripped apart

And that is the story ‘bout a man and his wife
Separated by light years due to galactic strife
You must fight the resistance they told him that day
But there is no fight left after love’s ripped away

Say you’ll come back to me, XB-813
I’ll come back to you and we’ll see this through
Don’t let them see the tears running down your face
I’ll send you my love from the Starkiller Base
Track Name: Bumblebee is a Volkswagen
Bumblebee is a Volkswagen
That’s why he’s named Bumblebee

It’s not simply because he’s yellow,
And that’s something that’s plain to see

Chevy put a bunch of money into a wheel barrow
And paid Michael Bay to make him a Camero

Bumblebee is a Volkswagen
And that’s why he’s named Bumblebee

Bumblebee is a Volkswagen
And also he knows how to talk

Speaking via radio might seem cool
But it’s actually lame on second thought

They painted flames on Optimus Prime
Then turned poor Bumblebee into a mime

Bumblebee is a Volkswagen
And that’s why he’s named Bumblebee

Volkswagen bugs are what it’s all about
Come on, everybody it’s time to transform and rollout.

Bumblebee is a Volkswagen
That’s why he’s named Bumblebee

It’s not simply because he’s yellow,
And that’s something that’s plain to see

The product placement’s strong but I’m no fool
‘Cuz I know Camaros aren’t that cool

Bumblebee is a Volkswagen
And that’s why he’s named Bumblebee
Track Name: T.U.D.Y.K.
I see you over there, talking to the other boys
And I’m Powerless as to what I’m supposed to do

I’m sitting at my desk playing with my dinosaur toys
And I can’t stop thinking about you

You may think I have the voice of an acerbic droid
But it’s just something that I can’t avoid

Cuz I’m just here to say, I want to be your T-U-D-Y-K
And it will be ok, If you let me be your T-U-D-Y-K

We’ll soar together like leaves on the wind
When I play dodgeball you know I play to win
Like Alan Tudyk

I promise that I’m not some kind of Con Man
This feeling can’t just be some kind of fluke

When I make corny jokes, you can just stare at me deadpan
And I’ll never exploit you like an evil Duke

Come out to my cabin, it’s in the woods
I hope I’m not being misunderstood

Cuz I’m just here to say, I want to be your T-U-D-Y-K
And it will be ok, If you let me be your T-U-D-Y-K

This heart of mine has never known such pain
Without you I’m like a chicken with no brain
Like Alan Tudyk

I’m just like a pirate but I don’t only want booty
I’ll pilot the ship if you can be my kick ass beauty

Cuz I’m just here to say, I want to be your T-U-D-Y-K
And it will be ok, If you let me be your T-U-D-Y-K

Even if I glitch I promise to stay true
Until then, I'll be here reading the news
Like Alan Tudyk
Track Name: Sweet Costumes
We’ve been together for a while now
So you must know my style by now
But it might be confusing
To see all the duct tape I’m using
I may not be as skilled as you
But I know something we both love to do

We’re making sweet sweet costumes all night long
We’re making sweet sweet costumes and it aint wrong

This isn’t something I ask of everyone
But can you grab a hold of my hot glue gun
And hold the trigger oh so firmly
And no, we’re not in a hurry
Now we’re getting down to business
My battle sword is almost finished

We’re making sweet sweet costumes all night long
We’re making sweet sweet costumes and it aint wrong

Scissors!
Paint!
Leather!
Wigs!

The costume contest is tomorrow
I’ve got some things I need to borrow
Get the tools out of your bag
There’s no need to let anything sag

We’re making sweet sweet costumes all night long
We’re making sweet sweet costumes and it aint wrong
We’re making sweet sweet costumes all night long
We’re making sweet sweet costumes and it aint wrong
Track Name: Tank
I gather up my friends for a party tonight
Going on a special quest that’s right
We run into some trolls who are intent on bringing us a fight
It’s time to show our might

I’ll be the tank, I’ll pull the aggro
If you need a meat shield just call out my name
I’ll be the tank you sling the arrows
We all have a part to play in this game

I’ve got my armor up and I’m going in
Healers can save me while I take it on the chin
While the clerics and mages use their powers to make them start all over again
It’s our turn to win

I’ll be the tank, I’ll pull the aggro
If you’re not safe they can direct it all at me
I’ll be the tank, you make them let go
We’re all teamed up for everyone to see

When my taunts take effect
I know I might get wrecked
But it’s how I choose to play
When my taunts take effect
you know I might get wrecked
but We’ll live to fight another day

I’ll be the tank, I’ll pull the aggro
I’ll pull the chain while you storm the gate
I’ll be the tank, you throw your lasso
It’s our time to intimidate

I’ll be the tank, I’ll pull the aggro
If you need a meat shield just call out my name
I’ll be the tank you sling the arrows
We all have a part to play in this game
Track Name: Weird Al Rules
Sometimes I think about getting up early and the way I
walked to the bus stop for another day of 7th grade
I just wanted to go to class, maybe make some people smile
But the kind of things I liked weren’t the things that were in style

I couldn’t help the way I looked, I know I talked too loud
They would grab me and push me to the ground

During P.E I was told I was no good out by the bleachers
Not just by the other kids but also by the PE teacher
Head slammed into the lockers, books knocked out of my hands
I grabbed a sharpie marker cuz I had a plan

I wrote “Weird Al Rules” upon my three ring binder
I know I’m not cool don’t need your reminder

Weird al rules is what I say
And they’ll never make me change the way I feel
Or shut me up and make me ashamed of the
Geeky stuff that's my deal
oh no… Weird Al Rules

My mom would talk to the school but they just told her boys will be boys
And I just wanted to be at home playing with my Star Wars toys
But I went every day and held my head up high
I fought back the best I could and looked them in the eye

And when I think about how they called me fat and lame
I just look around and see the rad life that I made

Weird al rules is what I say
And they should never change the way
you feel
Or shut you up and make you ashamed of the
Geeky stuff that’s your deal
oh no… Weird Al Rules
just remember Weird Al Rules
Track Name: Super Duper Con
Every geek and nerd, it’s time to gather ‘round
The greatest convention is coming to your town
It’s guaranteed to turn that frown upside down
Magic abounds at Super Duper Con

Your badge is non-refundable, first let’s make that clear
We’re trying our hardest have all your favorites here
Like the cast of Firefly,but they’ll be nowhere near
They all stay clear of Super Duper Con

It doesn't matter how many vendors are on the scene
They're going to pack you in like nerd sardines

Sign up today for Super Duper Con
Save up and pay for Super Duper Con
There's so much to see
And autographs are an additional fee
So join me, at Super Duper Con

When you first arrive, your information won’t be there
You’ll say you registered months ago but nobody will care
Your anger and frustration will be met with a blank stare
Come if you dare, to Super Duper Con

The line up is starting for the panel in room four
Featuring a preview that will leave you wanting more
If you think you might get in, they’re gonna stop you at the door
Don’t get sore, It’s just Super Duper Con

Afterwards, you won’t be able to pay the rent
If you cosplay they can’t guarantee a safe environment

Sign up today for Super Duper Con
Register and pay for Super Duper Con
You’re gonna catch the flu
And there’s nothing you can do
It's all true at Super Duper-

Sign up today for Super Duper Con
Save up and pay for Super Duper Con
There’s no place to park
You want to be careful after dark
Hit the mark at Super Duper Con
Track Name: We'll Just Let The Song Speak For Itself
Are there any Star Trek fans here tonight?
Well if you’re a fan like me, you love our next song
I think the old movies are dynamite
In particular, Star Trek II – The Wrath of Kahn
Well I could continue explaining things to you
But I think that you’ll agree there’s only one thing left to do

We’ll just let the song speak for itself
It’s plenty good on its own, without an explanation
We’ll just let the song speak for itself
Keep the focus on the music and only talk in moderation Whoaaaaooohhh yeahhhhhhhh

Telling a story might sound good to some
Right before we play our next song
But then I start to ramble on and sound dumb
And everyone’s like, “What’s taking so fucking long?
Going forward, we’ll make it a guideline
And make it a point to stop wasting everybody’s time

We’ll just let the song speak for itself
It’s plenty good on its own, without an explanation
We’ll just let the song speak for itself
Keep the focus on the music, sorry for any frustration
Whoaaaaooohhh yeahhhhhhhh

But if you don’t get the context what will we do
As artists it’s a question we must face
But we will have the power to push on through
And leave you with this final word just in case

We’ll just let the song speak for itself
It’s plenty good on its own, without an explanation
We’ll just let the song speak for itself
Keep the focus on the music and only talk in moderation

We’ll just let the song speak for itself
It’s plenty good on its own, without an explanation
We’ll just let the song speak for itself
Keep the focus on the music, sorry for any frustration

Whoaaaaooohhh yeahhhhhhhh

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